


With all my love (And almost all of my mind)

by rumxrs



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: F/M, M/M, i just needed to release words, kags gets angry over a sandwich, this is formatted kind of oddly
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-29
Updated: 2016-03-29
Packaged: 2018-05-29 19:59:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,175
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6391216
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rumxrs/pseuds/rumxrs
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kei heaves a sigh, raking a hand through his short blonde curls. Tobio repeats the action unknowingly, and shivers shortly afterwards. A nervous shiver, like death was sending spearmint puffs of air down his neck. </p><p>***</p><p>Their story; told in snapshots, phone conversations, and dreams.</p>
            </blockquote>





	With all my love (And almost all of my mind)

**Author's Note:**

> Flower Meanings: 
> 
> Candy Tufts - Indifference
> 
> Hyacinth - Games and Sports; Rashness: Flower Dedicated to Apollo
> 
> Jonquil - Love Me; Affection Returned; Desire; Sympathy; Desire for Affection Returned
> 
> White Violet - Let's Take a Chance on Happiness

_He’s falling, falling, falling backwards. The concrete is rushing to meet his back, it feels like he’s been falling forever, and it’s not any closer._

_He’s not sure how he’s able to gauge the speed at which he’s falling, or the time, with the fact that he isn’t even facing the ground. He is sure that there are supposed to be people waiting to catch him at the bottom, he can feel their gazes, but whenever he looks towards the ground; they’re not there._

_He’s sure of it now, he can hear the crushing impact bound to happen_

_3..._

_2.._

_1_

_A hand catches his arm, and an arm wraps around his waist. He’s lowered slowly, safely onto the ground. He looks around, and as expected, there’s no one there._

_The moon shines bright_

* * *

 

“Why’re you here?” Tobio quips after Tsukishima snickers for the third time that night. “Don’t you have better things to do, like jerk off to a dictionary or something?”

“Making observations, King. Stupidity in it’s natural habitat is truly a sight to behold.” He grins. “And the _materials_ I use definitely go beyond dictionaries, since you took the interest.”

“Gross. You’re pretentious and gross.” Tobio huffs, setting the ball to a far off wall.

“Three syllables, eleven letters, you even have the context right. Your linguistic skills have improved, king.”

“Will you just shut up and tell me why you’re here?” Tobio snaps, turning fully to face the blonde who is standing with his arms crossed. He’s met with silence, which only adds fuel to the fire.

“If you don’t have any business with me, go be a dick somewhere else. Somewhere people might actually want to put up with your shit.” Tobio scoffs. “Oh right, that place doesn’t exist in this universe.”

Tsukishima shifts slightly, casts his eyes downwards and pulls his arms a little closer into his chest. When he speaks, it’s small, quick and rushed. “Don’t want to go home. Why are you here?”

“Cause I want to be” Tobio responds. “Don’t go home, but at least do it quietly.”

“I’d say the same to you, but you’re oddly quiet without shrimpy around. Send me a couple tosses, King”

“Shut up” Tobio says, but tosses anyway. Tsukishima effortlessly spikes it back to him.

“You’d be a well rounded player if you could toss and set.” Tobio observes, earning a sarcastic thanks from Tsukishima.

They practice slowly, conversations coming in snippets and short huffs of laughter. It’s only when Tsukishima checks his watch and exclaims _shit!_ does Tobio realize the time.

They rush into the changing room, and they’re out of the gym in record time. Tobio stays back to lock up, and watches Tsukishima’s retreating back.

He’s really not all that bad.

* * *

 

_Flowers bloom across his skin, they trace themselves into patterns and color themselves in. It’s often the same flower when it blooms; different day, different flower. Today it’s different. Candy tufts bloom across his left arm, his right is covered in Hyacinths, Jonquils bloom over his heart, and white violets spring up his legs._

_He’s not sure how he knows all this about flowers, but he does, and he idly traces a Jonquil._

_“I don’t want to go home”_

_Tobio huffs, and the Jonquils disappear. He questions their absence, then questions their original presence._

_He looks around, the scene familiar to his past self. Kitagawa Daiichi’s gym is empty, save for a lone volleyball with a face drawn on it, like a crude imitation of Cast Away, and Tobio himself. The net is lying in a far corner, not set up, and he sees a small pool of blood next to the ball._

_He’s spent so much time in this gym that it could be considered his new home._

_“Don’t want to go home”  
_

_Tobio understands._

* * *

 

“Why do they call you King of the Court?” Tsukishima asks, one day.

“Why do you call yourself a commoner?” Tobio shoots back.

“Does it matter what a commoner calls themself?” Tsukishima smiles. “The kings word is law, correct?”

 _But what if I’m not a king?_ Tobio thinks. He sits down next to Tsukishima. “We’re talking Monarchy here, right? Not Totalitarianism.”

Tsukishima opens his mouth. He tries to speak, but a strangled “um” is all that comes out. He shuts his mouth again, and shakes his head. “You know that blonde guy from Fukurodani?”

Tobio thinks. “Konoha? The number seven? What about him?”

“Do you know what he says about Bokuto?”

“Not really, no.” 

Tsukishima grins, slightly. “He says that if you look at Bokuto’s stupidity from a slightly different angle, it’s actually kind of genius. That pisses him off.”

“I guess that can be true, but can’t you do the same with every idiot?” 

“My point exactly” Tsukishima says, grinning as he narrowly avoids a kick to the shin. 

* * *

 

“You’ve been spending a lot of time after practice lately, Tsukki” 

“That an issue, vice? You’ve been spending a lot of time with Yachi, lately.”

“Well- no, but-”

“Then why bring it up?”

“Because you’re acting different, I’m your vice captain and your best friend. I’m worried.” 

“You’re a lot of things. A male, a son, a student, middle blocker, pinch server..Really, Yamaguchi, the list goes on.”

“Stop being so cryptic for once and tell me what’s up.”

“No.” Kei drawls into the phone, prolonging the sound in the space between the N and the O. 

“Fine, I’m going to sleep. Just...take care of yourself, Okay, Tsukki?” 

“...” 

“Tsukki? Tsukki!” 

_Click._

* * *

 

They’ve long since abandoned Volleyball as a false pretense cover up for their after practice meetups. Kageyama stares straight ahead, eyebrows furrowed in concentration, at something off in the distance. Next to him, Kei is picking the crust off a sandwich that he didn’t eat for lunch. It’s the fourth one that week.

Neither of them mention it.

Instead, Kageyama stands and stretches, offering a hand to Kei, who raises an eyebrow. “Let’s go somewhere” he offers, as explanation.

Kei,throws the sandwich in a nearby trashcan, watches as Kageyama scrunches his nose up in distaste. It’s cute, he notes.

“Problem?” 

“Don’t waste food like that, Shittyshima.” 

Kei lets a wry smile take over his face at the recurrence of the old nickname. “Well I wasn’t going to eat it, doubt you would either.” 

“That isn’t the point! You shouldn’t let something go to waste if it still has potential.” 

“Potential for what? I’m not hungry, it’ll go bad if I save it for tomorrow, and I won’t even want it then. And it’s not going to become the ruler of the league of terrible lunches.” Kei states matter-of-fact-ly 

“You’re so literal” Kageyama huffs, and that’s when Kei thinks that Kageyama was never talking about the sandwich in the first place. But Kageyama is walking off now, and Kei remembers that he’s still supposed to be following him, so, naturally and unconsciously, they both do what they do best.

They don’t mention it.

* * *

 

That night, Tobio took Tsukishima to an empty park, sat him down on a field, and asked if Tsukishima thought heaven was real. 

“...Or anything like it” Tobio finishes. 

“I dunno” Tsukishima mutters, eyes fluttering closed. “Why don’t you go find it?”

“I’d have to die first you know, you don’t want me dead” Tobio says, and glances at Tsukishima 

“Debatable.” 

Something flashes in Tobio’s eyes, and he looks away. “I don’t think heaven is the place for me anyway, purgatory is much more neutral.”

* * *

 

It’s a little while after the third night on that hill when Tsukishima opens his mouth for another stupid question. Tobio stopped counting when he forgot what he was counting for. He doesn’t think he’ll remember. The chill of November is just beginning to stab icicles into the pores of his skin when Tsukishima speaks.

“Did you have anyone you really cared about, you know, before?” He asks, looking up at the stars. 

“No” Tobio replies, and pauses. “Let me think.” He says, honest.

Tsukishima sits patiently for all of five seconds before speaking again. “Do you still care about them?”

“Well, I thought. Answer is still no, I’d say my old teammates, but they were kind of just-” 

“Your pawns?” Tsukishima suggests, smirking. 

“-people that I needed - to win. Nice to know that I’ve elevated from a king to a God, though.” Tobio hums. “I wonder if they think of me, or what they think of me. Do you think they’re good thoughts?”

“Being honest, probably not.” 

Tobio huffs, smiles. “Yeah..but what about you?”

Tsukishima goes rigid, and Tobio has his answer. He clears his throat and pushes his glasses up on the bridge of his nose. “Same answer as you” he says, uneasily.

“Now where’s the lie in that?” Tobio presses. “Not even someone you stopped caring about, even for a little while?”

Tsukishima turns to fully face Tobio, eyes blazing. “What did Yamaguchi say?” He demands. 

“Gotcha.” Tobio smirks. “He didn’t tell me anything, things are just pretty easy to read, once the book is open.” 

* * *

 

“Kei? Kei! Is something wrong?” 

Kei holds the phone away from his ear, Akiteru’s voice coming just a bit too loud. In the distance he can hear Saeko in the background hollering about something or other.

“Nothing’s wrong.” He finally says

“You usually don’t call unless something’s wrong..” 

“Nothings wrong at all.” Kei says, his voice cracks. 

“I’m your big brother, that’s never going to change. You can tell me anything Kei.” The background noise has quieted down, and Akiteru sounds worried. 

“Everything is fine, Akiteru.” Kei says, he feels something warm and wet hit his cheek. “I think it’s going to rain soon. I have to go, tell Saeko-san I said hi”

“Kei you’re calling from the landline” 

“Bye Akiteru, it was nice hearing from you again. You should call me more often. Pleasant surprise today.” 

“ _You_ called _me_ , Kei. On a completely unrelated note, is mom home?” 

“No” 

“Fuck...shit, alright, Kei. Listen to me-” 

“Don’t tell me what to do, Asshole.” Kei snarls into the phone, and hangs up, before Akiteru can even finish the muffled cry of his name.

* * *

 

_It’s summer. Tobio can tell because all he’s wearing is a T-shirt and a pair of black shorts. He’s leaning against a wall, and there’s a water spout directly above his head. He doesn’t remember moving his hands, but all of a sudden, it’s on, and pouring cool water onto Tobio’s burning skin._

_Except, the water doesn’t run, like it’s intended to. It begins to gather in a pool around Tobio, rising every few seconds. He’s neck deep before he knows it._

_He lets his head loll to the side, and shuts his eyes._

_There’s always a time for rest._

* * *

 

Kei heaves a sigh, raking a hand through his short blonde curls. Tobio repeats the action unknowingly, and shivers shortly afterwards. A nervous shiver, like death was sending spearmint puffs of air down his neck.

“I feel cold, but it’s a weird kind of cold.” Tobio says at last. 

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Kei quizzes. 

“Like, the cold won’t go away. I feel cold when I’m warm, too. I could wear a million layers and I won’t feel a damn change. I also feel like there’s a weight on my chest. My head feels empty too, like I couldn’t think even if I tried-” 

“You can’t think in the first place.” 

“Shut up.” Tobio snaps “I’ve been feeling like shit for a long fucking time, I just needed to say it out loud.” 

“Mission accomplished. What the hell do you want me to do about it?” Kei mutters, pulling his collar close to his neck.

“Try to have a little empathy, you prick.” Tobio snarls, anger slowly tiding in, overlapping in waves of itself. 

“You learn to live with it.” Kei says thickly, and slowly extends an arm to wrap around Tobio’s waist, awkwardly dragging him sideways to rest on Kei’s shoulder.

“Oi, Tsu-” 

“Warm up.” Is all that he offers. 

* * *

 

_2 years later_

It’s nearing the end of December when Tobio unpacks the last of the boxes. Exhaling, he stands straight up, and surveys the small apartment. His sightseeing is cut brutally short however, when a pair of arms sneak around his sides.

“Kei, what the hell-” Tobio protests. 

“I think we might need a space heater. Two broke college kids can’t really afford a nicer apartment, and I’m cold as hell.” Kei muses. “Or you can keep your mouth open” he whispers, pressing a small kiss to Tobio’s neck.

Tobio hums and leans into the touch. “And why is that?”

“Cause all the hot air you keep instead of a brain would eventually make it’s way out.” Kei murmurs, stepping away from Tobio, as if to brace himself. 

“Wow, funniest joke I’ve heard all year. You should ditch the archaeology course and go for stand up comedy” Tobio comments dryly, and lightly punches Kei’s shoulder. 

“Good idea.” 

“And let’s revisit the space heater” Tobio says, draping himself over their sofa. “I’m feeling pretty warm.”

**Author's Note:**

> I'm in rarepair hell, honestly. 
> 
> This was mostly done in an attempt to get words out of my head, it worked, and to try out a new writing style. Sorry if this seemed in any way plotless or boring, thank you for reading!
> 
> As always, my tumblr (Writing Blog) is Daichiebooks!


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